5★ Jeon Woochi

Fire Jeon Woochi

In a kingdom shrouded by the traditionally mystic atmosphere of the East, there is a story—bordering on legend—of a certain Taoist master.

Jeon Woochi was said to sport a stylish hat, always tipped at an angle, and to carry a calligraphy brush as large as he was. The story states that one day he just suddenly appeared, his overcoat tails fluttering in the wind.

His genius for the Taoist arts was matched only by his enthusiasm for experimentation, a trait that often led him to test his abilities in new environments. That is to say, Woochi never hesitated to infiltrate corrupt officials’ houses to test out his newly learned techniques. He strolled into their mansions as though the doors had been wide open, bringing to naught their fortifications and any efforts made to stop him, and when each house invariably turned to shambles, he could be found at the center of it, his coattails gracefully fluttering in the wind.

The truth is, Jeon Woochi did not think of himself as some sort of heroic outlaw; he was merely trying to alleviate his boredom by practicing new magic he’d developed, and the houses of corrupt officials happened to be perfect environments for him to do this.

Nevertheless, Woochi’s supporters grew in number every year, and eventually they started to treat him as a hero of the people. Whispers in the streets called him Jeon Woochi, “the Taoist master who can be everywhere at once” and “the judge of corrupt officials”. Due to his relaxed and carefree personality, though, and despite the grandeur of such titles, he paid little attention to such rumors.

The rumors spread further and further, becoming more embellished with each retelling, until one day special orders were issued for the capture of Jeon Woochi.

…

“And for this, the crime of inciting chaos among the people, Jeon Woochi is hereby sentenced to death.”

…

The entire nation came to know Woochi’s face. Once security measures had been heightened and he was no longer able to visit the taverns and bookstores he frequented, Woochi surrendered himself and was arrested in front of the palace.

It is said he then went on to die in prison, having never received a proper trial.

Water Jeon Woochi

“Wait, does that mean the Jeon Woochi sipping his bowl of makgeolli here on the airship is a ghost?”

“Clearly you haven’t read the whole story. It’s said he died in prison, but when his relatives demanded they dig up his grave, his body was nowhere to be found.”

“What?! His body just disappeared? Did he become… a zombie?!”

“What? No! He used his magic to escape.”

“Oh, I was picturing some plague that spread all across Joseon, causing the dead to rise again and start biting the living, who would use these things called ‘resurrection herbs’… And one of the guys with this cool hat would cut through the monsters with his sword…”

“Otherworld masters always say the strangest things. Your world must really be odd.”

“According to another story, Jeon Woochi checked out a book that was popular at the time… on a day long after he’d allegedly died in prison.”

“Ooh, so he used Taoist magic to fake his death.”

“Yup, all while the real him was free to wander around.”

“What was the name of the book he checked out? The popular one.”

“…’The Incident of the Mistress Who Only Gave Food to the Servant, Vol. 26’…”

“…That is quite the title.”

“I met up with a friend who knows a lot about you, Jeon Woochi. It was very enlightening. I heard you can use magic to fake your death, and that you’re from a completely different place than Lien, unlike Sun Wukong and the others. Also that you read sketchy books…”

“I never realized you wanted to know so much about me! Well, you’re right. There’s a unique literary culture where I’m from, where a lot of readers eventually became authors. They’d check out a book, and when they didn’t like how it ended, they’d rewrite the ending. Then they’d print it, sneak into the place they got it from, and swap in their ending. Thanks to that, the same novel often had dozens of different branches and versions. Granted, I’m sure we’re not the only culture with branching stories…”

“I don’t really understand.”

“For example, in some versions of ‘The Tale of Shim Chong’, the wife stabs her husband to run off with her lover…”

“That’s doesn’t sound like a different version, that’s like… a different story.”

Wood Jeon Woochi

“What is a Taoist master? Traditionally, it is one who controls the power of the five elements—fire, water, wood, light, and dark—and who can dart around the sky as one would on the ground while masterfully wielding a giant brush capable of splitting asunder everything beneath the heavens; all of these things are used to help the poor and the weak.

“Just as fish start to rot from the head, so too has corruption seeped into our leadership. I, the great Taoist master Jeon Woochi, am here to relieve the people suffering from our corrupt officials. You should be grateful.”

– Quote from Jeon Woochi, recorded by an otherworldly master

“Jeon Woochi, what’re you doing squatting there like that? Digging something up?”

“Oh, you don’t know what this is? We call this a ‘homi’.”

“…?”

“It’s a type of hand plow used for farming where I’m from. Its comfort and utility make it perfect for gardening.”

“…You sound weird. Have you been drinking makgeolli again?”

“…No. Do you really not know what this is? *sigh*… This is the sort of rabble I have to deal with….”

“Is this some sort of act? Was I supposed to laugh?”

“Er, yes, it was a joke… That’s strange. Chorangyi always laughed when I told it to him…”

“The place you’re from, is it at all related to the Baby Shark place?”

“Baby Shark? Oh, you mean that cute yellow shark on the airship? The one that goes ‘doo doo doo doo doo’.”

“Yeah, that one. There are a lot of things in Latecia that are similar to my world, like both you and Baby Shark.”

“What do I look like in your world? Handsome, no doubt, and stylishly dressed, I assume.”

“I don’t know about the looks part, but as for your hat and clothes… well, what you’re wearing now feels like it was reimagined a bit from my world, like the traditional elements were redesigned.”

“But I was good looking in your world, right? Chiseled face and all?”

“The actor who played you in the movie was handsome, at least…”

Light Jeon Woochi

“We’ve got another nuisance on our hands. As if Gatito wasn’t enough, escaping prison and treating Bisden like his playground, there’s a new vigilante in town who uses strange magicks and calls himself Jeon Woochi, a ‘Taoist master’ who supposedly protects the weak by punishing corrupt officials. I’m sure you can already imagine the headache I’m having.”

– A letter from D’Artagnan that starts with “Dear…”. The recipient’s name has been erased.

“Jeon Woochi is destroying the order of Latecia using the strangest magicks I’ve ever seen. No small number of citizens have been entranced by his bizarre trickery, but I cannot simply sit on my hands and allow him to run free. I shall detail here one of his recent exploits, something heretofore quite unheard of.

…

“Having invaded the house of a high-ranking official, Jeon Woochi was surrounded by guards. Suddenly, accounts say he took out a regular bottle and began to draw a red strap around its neck. As soon as he finished, there appeared out of nowhere a strap around each of the guards’ necks, just like the one on the bottle. Realizing what happened, the guards began to panic, at which point Jeon Woochi is reported to have yelled, ‘Now, what do you think will happen to you if I remove the neck from this bottle?'”

– A letter from D’Artagnan that starts with “Dear…”. The recipient’s name has been erased.

“With a single bottle he got all he wanted, and then proceeded to beat up the official in front of all there before disappearing into a painting of Bisden on the wall. I’m sure you are skeptical, wondering how a person could disappear into a painting, but it is true. He jumped right into the frame and disappeared into the scenery of a painting of Bisden.

“Later reports even corroborate this account, saying that in that same moment, Jeon Woochi suddenly appeared at Bisden Crossing in front of a famous tavern—the place depicted in the painting, which means he used the painting as a means of transportation. It baffles the mind, to say the least.”

– A letter from D’Artagnan that starts with “Dear…”. The recipient’s name has been erased.

Dark Jeon Woochi

It was another typical day in which Jeon Woochi helped people, his good deeds following the same kind of inertia as usual: two days ago, he was bored; yesterday, he tested a new technique he’d devised; and today, he enjoyed some freshly made injeolmi, a type of traditional rice cake he had received for free from a local shop.

Thus should have continued the hero’s good deeds in punishing corrupt officials. However, on that day, in which the sun seemed to shine especially bright, Jeon Woochi witnessed a series of sights that felt both foreign and somehow familiar at the same time.

A man was being taken in by the police. Upon getting a closer look at him, Jeon Woochi immediately recognized him as a man he had saved not long before. What were the charges against him? Why were there others that were jeering him?

As the commotion moved further away, two realizations dawned on Woochi: first, that the man’s family had not been with him, and second, that the three corpses covered in straw that Woochi had seen exactly matched in number the man’s wife and two children…

The man lamented that, having been beaten down by their hardships in life, he had planned to take his entire family with him to the afterlife. But Jeon Woochi remembered a different story. He remembered several days earlier, when the man took a month’s worth of money the family had saved and blew it all on gambling and drinking. Woochi realized the man had acted as a tyrant in his own home, the same way the corrupt officials had been with their people, and that ultimately they all tried to avoid responsibility by disposing of any helpless witnesses…

Nothing had been out of the ordinary. Jeon Woochi had done what he always did. But as he let the sunlight pour down on him like a waterfall of light, countless incidents flashed through his mind, incidents that he had long forgotten—awful things that had repeated again and again, but that he had ignored.

Suddenly, Jeon Woochi remembered something someone had told him long ago: “water always flows from top to bottom”. The strong exploit the weak, and the weak wander their entire lives to find someone weaker than them.

Likewise, powerful nations exploit weaker ones, officials exploit their people, and the people take it out on those who are even more vulnerable—those outside the mainstream. This cycle of exploitation connects all members of society, causing them to despair when they look up and breathe a sigh of relief when they look down. Water never moves upward; just as it is pulled down by gravity, so too is human nature always on a trajectory downward.

The thought then occurred to Jeon Woochi: what does that make people like him, heroes of the people who punish corrupt officials? Are all the legends of heroes mere deceptions meant to cover up the unending downward spiral of human nature? Are they nothing more than a great, giant misconception that the achievements and sacrifices of a single hero can restore order and justice to society?

After the noontime sun had set and the deep blues of dusk began to cover the ground, Jeon Woochi stood up from where he was. Things in this world may only flow downward, but there are those who fight to overcome that. They are the ones with courage.

In truth, courage is not complicated; to be courageous, you need only try to fight against the exploitative nature of humanity, or against the crooked cycles that have come to permeate society over the years.

Dusk gave way to the stillness of midnight, and in the darkness Jeon Woochi realized what he had to do. It may not ever come to fruition in his lifetime, or even in all humanity’s lifetime. Yet still he stood up and began to repeat to himself his realization—that it is only when humans reject human nature that they can truly be human.